.

My New "Yearn for Freedom" Blog;
www.yearnforfreedom.blogspot.com

Sunday, January 31, 2016

A Scary Situation

   This morning I parked outside a McDonalds to use the bathroom and a crude man jumped out of a car that parked next to me. In short, he swore and cussed and yelled at me. He was obviously a puppet for those who target me. I do not remember most of what he said. A part of me shut down, because he was so obnoxious and threatening. But another part of me refused to let him see my fear. I was surprised that I even calmly opened my door when he leaped out of his car, as if to head for mine, while raging something like, "I am going to bash your brains out!"
   Luckily he did not act on it, but kept yelling obscene things as he climbed back into his car and his partner drove away. I would not want to write the names he called me. And all I had said to him was, "Please watch your language," and then as he cussed at me I said, "I hope you find your heart," a few times. Now, over eight hours later and after I pulled my focus away from writing the previous post, I am starting to feel more shaken by it.
     I have experienced the most obnoxious, rude, crude things from puppets in the past couple years. There are only a couple other times in my life when I've been spoken to with such vulgarity. Its hard to have to deal with, not just the threats, but also the personalities that I would normally not let myself be subjected to. But, in my situation, I have no choice. I need the technological tortures and interference, as well as the covert threats and harassment to stop, but hasn't. And the only way out, they say, is to leave my life and join them and I can not do that.

www.targetedinamerica.com

P.S. I think this experience was actually a covert threat to technologically damage my brain. This is nothing new. I have lived under the threat of brain damage for a long time. And I am reminded of it almost every single day, as radio waves interfere with my brain and especially during those times when it inflicts torturous pain. . .like what just started the day after I posted this - at 6:09 pm on Feb 1, 2016. I've also gotten threats to technologically make me blind, induce kidney failure, cripple me, induce cancer...etc.

I Have Been Being Blackmailed

What is more Shameful - Standing up and Saying,
"I am Being Blackmailed" or Forever Joining
Those Who Perform Such Crimes?

   I have read and heard many stories about people, like ministers and politicians, being blackmailed into obedience after the instigation or fabrication of some sort of immoral act. This appears to be a regular pattern in the world of organized crime. And it appears that this is also happening to heavily Targeted Individuals, in order to force us into silence and/or into joining the covert program that targets us. Blackmailing tactics, especially when aided by certain types of drugs and remotely inflicted technological mind control, are a serious threat to many. And I think that the secrecy around these crimes greatly aids the success of those who perform them.
   I have already, on several occasions, aimed to expose this. But the threats against me persist and have been happening, on severe levels, in the past couple years, as I openly expose the targeting and they succeed with eliminating, enslaving or silencing people from my past who could have testified for my character. 
   I am not sure of all their blackmail manipulations, but I’ve had dreams that warned me of some of them. Some have been blatantly obvious, like when they've shoved me into destitution and tried to frame me for theft or prostitution. . .and when they had puppets follow me into restaurants and tell their children to climb into my lap. Its obvious that they have been orchestrating situations where they could accuse me of being a pedophile. My intuition has  helped me to avoid some of it. But some of it is impossible to avoid; one time they had a puppet arrange for a 13 year old boy to be left alone at a garage while my car was being fixed and I couldn't leave. (After this incident, they actually had a puppet park in front of me with a license plate that read, "framed" just before surrounding me with puppet cars that were attempting to perform a false covert "rescue.")
   I have experienced rounds of them calling me the "cat lady" after the cat of an aquaintance was missing, and a murdered (cut up) cat was found in the town I had lived in. I have no doubt that they took her cat, while terrorizing her - preventing the job and home I was about to obtain from her. Then they tried to make me feel responsible for what they did. There is also something connected with dogs that has been in the works for several years. I’ve experienced a few rounds of threats about dirty pictures on the web. I do not know what they are and have not even tried to look for them. But I had a dream warning of them putting my head on someone else's body in pictures for the web. I also had a dream that showed my unconscious body in a bed where my arm was being positioned around another woman. (I believe that this may have happened during the time when they had drugged and raped me directly after the Alstead floods. . .and that they were trying to make me look like a lesbian, which is something I would not do.) I have also received a lot of degradings about permiscuity with men, some obviously fabricated, like when I spent two days in a motel room with a man who appeared to be trying to "help" me when my car was disabled and I was dumped in the streets in the fall of 2013. Nothing happened between us, THAT I KNOW OF, but I can not help but wonder whether or not they drugged me and did something to me, because they have on other occasions and I’ve experienced extreme targeting of my pubic area since then. In the past couple years I have been lured to many places, under the pretense of covert help, until I realized that this is another one of their tactics. I have probably been drugged more than I realize. The times when I’ve known was when my body showed obvious signs of being raped and I had no recollection of the act.
   At one point I had intentionally gained weight with the hope of it helping to stop the drugging and raping. But in recent years I am realizing that I was not being drugged and raped just because criminal men found me attractive, but primarily to tear me down in various ways, and make me feel shame. When I realized that I should NOT be feeling ashamed of what THEY have done to me I started exposing the rapes. I am now very careful to not put myself in situations where they can do anything to my body. But this doesn’t save me from all of it.
   It appears that, when they can not keep us silent and can not force us into the most immoral or criminal acts, like pedophilia, theft, adultery, porn...etc., they just fabricate it in whatever ways they can. I have had several dreams warning about fabricated pictures on the web. I do not know if they have actually become public, because the treat of publicity appears to be the first tool used to silence or recruit us. But they are obviously very good at discrediting us, slandering us or ruining our careers when we refuse to join the program or can not be easily controlled. (My work has been severely sabotaged.) In my situation the odds of them succeeding to slander or frame me appear to be in their favor due to the secrecy around all parts of the covert targeting. Its even set up so that our exposing it can make us look guilty/defensive. As I write this I am even getting covert messages telling me to not post this because it will merely make me look bad. But I refuse to be silent about it, because I feel that the silence is what helps their success more than anything else.
   I sometimes find myself wondering how many people they have succeeded to blackmail into silence - onto their side. How many victims of blackmail, and other types of cruel threats, have faded into the shadows of this criminal secret society?
   Breaking the silence is probably easier for me, than it is for some, because I’m not a public figure. But I hope that those of you, who are public figures, and victims of blackmail, will seriously consider the following question and then follow your Hearts above all else.

What is more Shameful - Standing up and Saying,
"I am Being Blackmailed" or Forever Joining
Those Who Perform Such Crimes?

   Please help break the chains of silence and their deceitful hold on you. It is probably true that,
 “The Truth shall set you free.”

    Another danger in the threats and attempted framings part of the targeting of heavily Targeted Individuals is that, we can start feeling VERY JUSTIFIED anxiety in situations where we can be framed, or around concerns of people actually believing the fabrications or accusations. . .and this anxiety alone can make us APPEAR guilty. I have felt that some of the anxiety is technologically induced at strategic times, but some is my own natural fear of a seriously threatening situation.
   The fact that we have no place to turn for help, which acknowledges the technological and covert harassment parts of the targeting, is a deep legitimate concern. And they know this, because they even covertly threatened to try to make me look guilty through lasering my brain, in order to make my body twitch, if a police officer interrogates me to see if I am a pedophile.
   Around the threats, to frame, slander or kill me, are aims for the false “rescues” into the covert program that targets me. I have experienced many set ups and threats that seem geared toward making me feel like there is no way out of their destruction of my life - no way to prove my innocence or regain my freedom. And all of this APPEARS true, but I CAN choose to NOT go with them and to NOT silently let them do this to me. I can stand up for myself and others who experience this.

   How many have been silenced, framed or recruited through fabricated crimes or blackmails? How many lives have been destroyed? And how long will this be allowed to secretly continue? It needs to be stopped. All of the covert targeting desperately needs to be exposed and stopped. Please help break the chains of silence.


P.S. If they succeed with everything they have tried to set me up as, or frame me for, I'd be labeled as a prostitute, a pedophile, a porn queen, a child beater, a cat murderer, a drug addict, a thief, immoral, mentally ill, evil, a member of their program and only they would know what else! This is crazy! Its cruel and mean and it hurts, because its not true. I'm not perfect, but I am not what they aim to make out to be.

Thursday, January 28, 2016

World of Pain

   In the grandest scheme of things my situation sometimes seems small, but it also feels connected to it all. Sometimes it feels like there is a whole world of pain crying to be released - a whole world of slaves yearning to be free. . .and too few to know and let it show. I don't know how much my writings are allowed to be viewed by those who are not doing the targeting. But I hope for more to be reached with every written word - every planted seed. God, help humanity to be set free.

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Forced to Stand Alone

   Those who target me have gone through rounds of pushing me toward my family and old targeted friends, as if they can help me or stand up with me while the targeting continues. My experiences show me that this can not happen with those who are completely controlled, because it would just open doors to deeper levels of targeting against me. . .possibly even finish me off at this point. I have been sensing that there is a danger in known mind control victims being used in a false "stand up" with me.
   Unfortunately, my 2014 visit with an old targeted friend, and my written cry for help for him and another targeted friend, appears to have caused a vamp up in targeting against them. In short, what was left of those whom I felt would have stood with me appear to have been more heavily targeted, in the past year or two, and appear to now be dead or enslaved.
   As for my family of origin; I love my family, but they are unsafe for me, because they are unaware mind control victims and some have already played rolls in helping to target me. Some appear to be completely enslaved. And even if they were aware, and were able to over-ride the mind control and listen to their Hearts, my presence in the family would be unsafe for them. (The targeting has kept us separate through most of my adult life.) They are victims too and I hope they GENUINELY regain their freedom, someday. I hope we all do, but until that happens, and the technological mind control completely stops, it is impossible to reconnect in a functional, healthy way. My fight to expose the targeting has been for my family as much as for other loved ones and the rest of humanity.

There are more important things
Than me and them and you,
But it is all connected.
Humanity is in trouble too.
My hands now feel so tied -
There seems too little I can do.
But I pray that, somehow,
Light will see us through.

An Extreme Danger

    There is an extreme danger  that technological mind control could slyly continue even after being partially exposed by those who perform it. All along, there appears to have been aims to make aware people think that “its over” and that they/we are protected and that all will be OK, when it isn’t. It really isn’t. All levels of the technological and pharmaceutical targeting desperately needs to be honestly, genuinely and fully exposed and stopped. Please help this to happen.

I have restored the page that explains this blog;

Monday, January 25, 2016

New Address

I changed the address of my new blog from www.crowded-emptiness.blogspot.com to;

Another Vamp Up

6 - 7:30 am Torture levels of pain vamped up, while I layed awake thinking and praying. The heat and pain is still behind my eyes and in my forehead five hours later.

Friday, January 22, 2016

A Horrible Roller Coaster Ride

   During days like yesterday and the day before, when I am not being literally tortured, I feel like I can survive this for a bit longer. But at times, like since around 3am this morning, when I am being literally tortured or suffering the effects of it, I feel like I need all of this to have been over yesterday. Sometimes I feel like I am literally dieing, and I am. . .slowly. . .on every level. Last nights torture woke me from a sound sleep and left me feeling extremely weak and needing to focus inward, in order to recover and regain my strength at least to some degree. But as I do this I am surrounded by covert messaging, that I succeed with ignoring, especially since my hearing and eye sight were impaired by last nights torturing of my brain, until they start slamming doors and demonstrating loud displays of anger. When it hits this point its hard to ignore. These levels of covert harassment are common occurrences in my days, especially on those when I have experienced painful, often debilitating, levels of torture. Do they think that torturing me, or letting me be tortured, is going to help me trust and listen and follow them? It has the opposite effect. (As I write this they are again threatening to disable my vehicle/home, as if I have not already gone through enough today!)

Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Tribute to America

   I made this new page out of my wish for America, and the rest of humanity, to regain the freedom we had before the technological and pharmaceutical targeting.

Tribute to America

P.S. The day after this post I bought a used hard drive and AGAIN the shop owner rushed to put it on the internet, and do windows updates, against my wishes, (or it had already been set it up to be infiltrated). No matter how it was done, I have another hard drive in mt dell lap top BUT still do not have an UNinfiltrated computer to write on!!! I am still not being allowed to do any sort of writing without the usual interference and possible alterations - things erased or added by those who target me! This book has been interfered with on a massive scale! But there is nothing I can do. They seem to have control of literally every used computer store I have gone to. At another store they even appeared to have destroyed my old XP program disc and installed an infiltrated one!

New Song Lyrics, "Aching Needs"

I wrote this song a few days ago, with an ache in my heart, which I tried to let go. Than posted it on my more personal blog, while red doors slammed in a confusing fog. Dark opinions intrude with everything I do. I'd hoped it would soothe us. . .even you.
  
Aching Needs
by Sharon R. Poet

Tell me again. Please tell me all will be OK.
Then show the truth in words that you say.

Tell me. Please tell me that I was wrong.
Then write it down quickly into this song.

Tell me. Please tell me it's just a past game.
Then wash it away - let truth replace shame.

Forgive me. Please forgive all I've done wrong
As I forgive you between lines in my songs.

Know it. Please know that our pain is too real.
Show it. Please show it - care for how we feel.

Be good and be solid so we can depend
And lean on new towers of invisible friends.

Show me then prove it. Please just be real.
Give our world of pain a chance to be healed.

Show me. Please show me good is much stronger.
Hold me. Please hold me. I can't wait any longer.

Say it. Please say it. No secrets no more.
Then walk it and talk it. Unlock the lost door.

Soothe them. Please soothe the tears of a clown
And let freedom reach every microwaved town.

Freedom. Let freedom replace every wave.
Stand up until its done - humanity saved.

God, reach us. Please give us the strength we need.
Then Love us. Just Love us. Burst open the seeds.

Help us to see it - that beam of pure Light
Washing the wars from these passing nights.

Shine it. Please shine into every hidden part
Until its all gone - the pain and the dark.

Reach us. God, reach us. Too wounded we are.
Rub salve on our wounds and older scars.

Patch them. Please patch holes where we bleed.
Then fill every one of our Heart's aching needs.

Copyright 1/15/2016 with all rights reserved



Monday, January 18, 2016

MLK Wisdom Reiterated

"The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad
people but the silence over that by the good" ~ Martin Luther King Jr.

 "He who accepts evil, without protesting against it, is
really cooperating with it." 
~ Martin Luther King Jr.

"I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional Love
will have the final word." ~ Martin Luther King Jr.


Deprived of Lead Protection

   Through the past few days I have been being tortured every morning, shortly after I wake, with radio waves being shot into my brain. "You are going to get sicker," they said this morning. And I decided to do something more to protect my brain and aimed for what has worked before - I went to a hardware store to buy a roll of lead roof flashing to make a hat with. I was told, at the hardware store, that lead became "illegal to sell on January 1, 2015."
   I can not help but think that a hidden reason why lead has become illegal, is because it was a source of protection from radio wave targeting. A few years ago I heard that lead paint on houses prevents satellite surveillance from seeing in and that this was the real reason why it was being taken out of paints.
   Not allowing us any mode of protection feels just too horribly wrong. I should have kept the last lead hat I made, although they had tortured me horribly for using it to protect my head.

[Update; I later realized that this man had misinformed me. Why? Was it an intentional lie? I am not sure, but it looks like he was probably following orders from those who target me. I am now finding companies that sell lead. But buying it without interference may be another story. As I find them on the web I am sensing that those who target me are aiming to interfere in other ways.]


   Various things are happening, in order to
try to force me into enslavement or silence
.

www.targetedinamerica.com

P.S. A while ago, I a dream was projected into my brain as I was waking. It was a picture of a woman who had brown wart type things all over her skin. Since this I get a lot of covert messaging about "aging" and I am suddenly getting little bumps on my face, shoulders and neck, just like the woman in the picture they projected. When they were trying to get me to go with them, and thought they would succeed, they were doing the opposite - often sending the message, "Forever young." I guess this was supposed to entice me into a willing abduction. It appears that a lot can be done to our bodies with microwaves. What a horrible shame that these technologies are in the hands of those who aim to harm and control.
   My pictures are still being deleted from my computers and the quality of some of the ones I have on the web appear to have severely diminished.
 

Monday, January 11, 2016

Concern About Illegal Acess to the Vehicle I Live in

  In the past few days my driver side window is suddenly periodically malfunctioning. I am concerned that this may be a set up to leave it down, at a strategic time, in order for someone to gain access to it. This happened to my last car also and access was gained. I hope for this to not happen again, especially now. I feel more unsafe now than I ever have.

Sunday, January 10, 2016

Spilling the Beans

   I do not know if I will survive much longer and one of the things I was instructed to do, in order to get "help," was not mention anything about this. And I had not wanted to say anything publicly. . .ever. But that was if I were to be able to live freely and just do my work. This obviously is not happening. I do not even know how much longer I will be allowed to live and if any of my writings will be allowed to survive or remain the way I wrote them. At this point, there may be more danger in remaining silent than there is in sharing this.
   Why I have been targeted with such extreme efforts has been a mystery to many people, including me. But I have realized that those who target me seem to either think that I was Jesus in a past life, or want me to think that I was. Was I? I honestly don't know for sure. There are a few things in my early childhood, and a few other experiences, that can point in that direction. But it is possible that those who target me with mind control technologies have put some of this into my head, with technological brainwashings, just to make me look crazy. I wish I knew the Truth, but I have been too heavily targeted, since I was around 11 years old, to have even had a fair chance to freely live this life, let alone fully realize a past one. I honestly don't know and I have not been allowed the chance to safely, privately and peacefully figure it out and this does not look possible, at this point.
   I don't feel worthy, but I strongly feel that there are many people who are born with a life purpose that involves helping humanity. Most of us (if not all) are probably being targeted. One thing I do know for sure is that I wish we had the freedom we need and could ALL bring more pure Love/Light into our dark troubled world. And I wish that the covert harassment and criminal use of the mind control technologies and pharmaceuiticals were not preventing this vital process in too many of us.
    Another thing that I feel sure of is that Jesus lived for us and did NOT "die for us." I feel that He died because dark forces wanted Him out of their way and that its time for humanity to stop letting those forces destroy the good in our world. Please stand up for humanity's Freedom from covert, technological and pharmaceutical control.

God help America. I'm afraid that we have completely lost all that she used to stand for.

[ VIP Update September 2016; This post is a revised version of my reaction to those who target me and appeared to have orchestrated a situation to make me believe that I had been hit with lethal chemicals in the lobby of a building where an FBI office is, which was described in the previous post. It appears that this whole situation was to terrorize me. It definitely was effective with terrorizing me.
    In my heart I feel that there is a lot of good in our government, that their struggle with the infiltration must be immense, and that they will be here for us when they can be. But I sometimes lose sight of this, especially when I am being heavily hit with technological attacks to my brain and other body parts as well as covert threats. . .and have no safe place to run to...where there could be acknowledgment of the technological and covert targeting and protection from further harm.
   FYI; I had put the original post into the thirteenth edition of the book of this blog, which then immediately sold a copy, while I was still being too heavily targeted to figure things out and let my heart reassure me. This all seems to have been intentionally orchestrated. Since my only recent hard copy of the book of this blog was stolen from my car in 2016 I am concerned about, not only what manipulations that they have orchestrated through my writing about what they do, but also what they may be doing to alter my writings. And I am still deeply concerned about how infiltrated America may be. I guess time will tell. I hope it tells something good.]

The core of the previous post; Around 12:00pm (noon); I went to the Bedford FBI building, which was empty but open. I left another report outside the door of the FBI offices and noticed a strange chemical odor in the lobby as I left. After this a puppet told me a story about someone who was exposed to chemicals and is now on dialysis. The fact that I had previously had a dream about having to go on dialysis, has me deeply concerned. Then there was another threat to disable my car. . .

I was initially convinced that infiltrated parts of the FBI had done this to terrorize me. But the FBI is not the only business in that building. Obviously those who target me wanted me to believe that the FBI was terrorizing me and probably wanted me to write about it. This fits the pattern of them wanting us to blame our government. After I had posted my experience, and put it into my book, weapon attacks on my brain vamped up, my books were being tampered with and three of them actually sold, before I had a chance to figure it all out and change initial post.

This whole situation is indescribably difficult, because I have sensed that our government agencies, of all levels have been being targeted and infiltrated and it seems worse on local levels. The infiltration creates a grim situation for everyone, especially with no open acknowledgment of the technological crimes that are being committed against us all. It leaves people like me in a situation where it is hard to blame them, because they are victims too. . .yet it is dangerous to trust them. Its scary. The hidden mind control part of the targeting is the key to the infiltration's success and those who are victims of it need to be set free. When there are unaware mind control victims in positions of authority it creates a grim, terrifying situation. But the blame belongs to the infiltration and those who perform technological mind control on and use unsuspecting people in their aim to take over America.

In places where the good and the bad are entwined
The line between standing up for the good
And paving a road for the bad
Can be too fine.

There was initially at least one good FBI agent who had tried to help me in 2012. But it appears that he may have been targeted and/or prevented from helping me and I have been worried about this. I am deeply concerned about this whole situation, because in the past year, as I continue to send reports to FBI officials and other agencies around the globe, there has been an obvious vamp up in aims to destroy evidence, and witnesses, around my situation. Even people who have been used in covert aims to “help” me are suddenly being targeted in the past year (one was either killed or abducted and I was told that another one was in a serious "accident".) I feel scared for all of us.


God help America
And God help humanity to regain its Freedom

P.S. I hope that the good and uncontrolled parts of our government will not judge me by anything I write or say, especially during times when I am being terrorized and heavily targeted. Many of us desperately need their help.
I hope that my statements help to expose and stop the infiltration and its ruthless technological mind control on all of us. I hope that the dark manipulations, tortures and covert wars will soon be replaced by the type of good old fashioned values that help Hearts to stand up for Freedom and what is right - to stand up against the targeting, instead of against us victims. God, help all of us to regain our freedom.

P.S.S. If I do get extremely ill I do NOT want to be put into a hospital. My experiences tell me that there is extreme corruption in the medical field. . .making it unsafe for Targeted Individuals. Hospitals are a place where targeted people get drugged, harmed, killed and abducted. It should not be this way. But it is and I hope it changes soon.

Saturday, January 9, 2016

Most Discouraging Experience with the FBI

[ VIP Update September 2016; This post had contained my response to those who target me and appeared to have orchestrated a situation to make me believe that I had been hit with lethal chemicals at an FBI building. It is now clear to me that this whole situation was orchestrated to terrorize me into blaming the FBI and going to the state police instead of them.
   I had put the original post into the edition thirteen book of this blog and the book immediately sold a copy, while I was still being too heavily targeted to figure things out.  A few other similar rounds of targeting, which include the period around my getting an email from President Obama in August 2015. Please also read the next post on this situation.]


The core of the original postAround 12:00pm (noon); I went to the Bedford FBI building, which was empty but open. I left another report outside the door of the FBI offices and noticed a strange chemical odor in the lobby as I left. After this a puppet told me a story about someone who was exposed to chemicals and is now on dialysis. The fact that I had previously had a dream about having to go on dialysis, has me deeply concerned. Then there was another  threat to disable my car.

Thursday, January 7, 2016

Another Serious "Accident"

   I recently learned that a mechanic - a good, kind man who had helped fix my vehicle after many attacks to it, (including a shot tire and a sudden brake loss) was in a serious vehicle crash. Was it really an "accident?" And is he still who he was?

PLEASE help stop these crimes from secretly continuing.
www.targetedinamerica.com


Later; I HAVE HAD IT!
   I have been going through hell for the past year connected to threats to withhold help unless I alter my writings in the Ramblings of a Targeted Individual book. But I now realize that whoever is doing this is surely not a good source of help and I do not know if one even truly exists for me anymore.
   In the beginning I had hacked up this book, erasing anything that may be my misperceptions and anything that could offend good officials who could help us. (Edition 9 was the result of this and it immediately sold three copies, unlike any other edition.) I did this out of desperation for help. But it got us nowhere. It EVEN seemed to appease those who target us. So I aimed to resurrect it. Since then, over and over again I have written apologies for any possible mistakes or misunderstandings or perceptions...etc., because I know I made a lot of them in my initial stages of using my blog to report things while trying to figure out the targeting and while writing on inflitrated computers during times when I was being too heavily targeted to be clear. . .hoping to appease those who have such an issue with this book.
   But this has obviously not satisfied them either. The pdf to edition four of "Ramblings of a Targeted Individual" (the most complete old edition) appears to have been replaced on my website this summer. What are they trying to hide or alter? I'm actually not sure anymore. Are the pdfs on my publisher's site safe? Are they being altered too? I hope not, but they seem to have some control there also, since my published second edition of "Poetic Voice of a Targeted Individual" was deleted although there are not even any options to delete books after they are published. No matter how I look at any of this it does not feel good to me. I find all of this deeply disturbing. This is not OK and I need it to stop. I need solid, unconditional, non-covert care and help from genuinely good honest people. And I wish this were available to us.

   Aside from this there has also been a heavy push to destroy evidence and witnesses, in other parts of my situation, through the past year. And I find this very disturbing.

A Blind Trust

   This whole situation is more than difficult due to no solid place where we can turn to for help - no officials who are acknowledging the crimes as lives continue to be destroyed and families torn apart. I do trust that there are good people, in the world, who are doing good things to secure humanity's future safety, but in my personal situation, it is a blind trust that needs something solid to build on and hold strong. Good solid people, with clear explanations, that deliver understanding and reassurance, are what earns trust and respect. I have not had that yet. I wish I did or could. I wish we all did.

 The Games

They blend into what looks the same
In the confusion of covert games.
I think, perhaps its this
Then perhaps its that,
But its all hidden
Beneath a dark hat,
Round and round
In dizzy circles
While I grope for
Invisible miracles.

   I have experienced many episodes, in the covert targeting, of those who target me zooming in, pretending to be good "rescuers"...etc. I know that there is genuine good in the world. And I have wished, for a long time, that it would openly stand in the Light. I have wished this for ALL of us. . .and still do. My heart aches through every day of this not happening, because the silence still appears to be making the darkness grow. We need the Light to grow.

The pull for my Attention

Its too dangerous
To honor the bad
In order to
Respect the good.
I wish they were
Separate -
That good stood apart
From the crazy games
That break my heart.

Can Micro Chips be Removed With Laser Weapons?

It appears that I am again being lasered in two areas where I suspect that micro chips had been installed into my body. Can they be destroyed, without a trace, through lasering? Is there a sudden push to destroy this sort of evidence right now? If so, why? I may never know.

Sunday, January 3, 2016

"Grief for Old TI Ridges" Targeted

   A technological attack began vamping up on my head as I posted, "Grief for Old TI Ridges" on my new blog. Its a horrible thing to not be able to express my feelings and experiences without being tortured for it. Then a puppet walked by and said something about bringing up old stuff from the past. This appears to be a common opinion of those who target us - to never look back...etc. But my heart knows how unhealthy it is to not look to the past. The past is what forms today and builds the future. We carry it inside of us whether we want to look at it or not. (This is why it so important to have the freedom to feel and heal and grow.) The past - its natural joys and sorrows. . .are what builds wisdom into our future. And the past tortures need to be faced in order to be healed.

 Grief for Old TI Ridges
 http://crowded-emptiness.blogspot.com

   This morning I woke and then dozed back to sleep and had a dream/vision. In it I was walking down a sidewalk and saw an elderly man sitting on a bench. I reached for his hand and as I held it I noticed deep ridges in his finger nails. Grief gripped me so hard that I began to cry, gasping for breath between my sobs. My legs collapsed from under me and I sat before him, head on his knees, crying for him - for his broken spirit - for the confused emptiness that decades of torture had set into his eyes.
   I woke up crying and, hours later, I still feel deep sadness for those of us who have suffered too much for too long. This pain has been accumulating in my heart for a long time. I cannot imagine that it will even start going away until the technological targeting is exposed and stopped and we have the validation and support that is needed for recovery to begin.

FYI; Ridges in fingernails are a sign of long term technological targeting. I have them too.