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Wednesday, April 8, 2015

An Extremely Vulnerable Place

   Recent chains of events  have me in an extremely vulnerable situation.  I was recently forced to put what is left of my writings, which is perhaps my only source of proving my sanity and the targeting, into the vehicle I'm living in. Since then there appears to be a plan to either steal or disable my vehicle and leave me on the streets.
    Also, around pushes to make me leave familiar areas have been repeated questioning of if I have relatives or friends here. The most recent push was yet another attempt to make me drive across the country.  After a puppets saying, "RV," and then an offer of money to leave,  came just before another call from the woman who has my RV in storage and has been demanding for it to be moved.  This is the second attempt to do this in the same way - to try to make me go rescue my RV. And I have had a dream which forewarned that I'd die if I go to the desert and I believe that this is their intent.
   I'm not afraid to die, but am not ready yet and would prefer to go in a familiar area where it would not be so easy for them to make me disappear through either enslaving me or killing me and cremating me as a "Jane Doe." I know this may sound a bit extreme, but it appears to be happening to genuinely Targeted people. (Which reminds me, what happened to Rachael Orbin and Billy's friend?) (FYI: The brakes and engine in my RV appear to have been destroyed, by those who target me, and it is in a storage yard in Arizona where it has also been obviously vandalized twice since being left there in 2009. I am now in New England.)
    There appears to be repeated rounds of pushes for "help" to try to get me to go there or leave places where there is even any chance of anyone stepping forward to help me if they were to incarcerate me, institutionalize me, steal my vehicle and what is left of my journals and life's work. . .or God knows what else.
   I again did not leave and now there is a sudden (obviously intentional) push to prevent me from getting financial help. This began with covert messages and then sudden doors closed by those who were helping me as well as those who have helped in the past. (One of them suggested that I leave the area and get help elsewhere and again also suggested that I go on disability, in order to get an income.) This financial slam also came at a time when it can be perceived as revenge or to prevent me from putting what is left of my belongings in a storage bin, or taking better care of myself, which I had been talking about doing.

   I feel really scared and too vulnerable to those who target me. I am not normally a fearful type of person, but my gut feeling is that this is a dangerous time for me and I do still have natural human feelings. . .thank God. I'm trying to have faith that somehow things will work out for me. I have faith that the good in global governments will grow and eventually stand up to end the lethal technological and covert targeting.  But I do not know if this will happen for me and a few others whom I know are also being heavily targeted. Our only present choices seem to be to either join and obey the covert program that is targeting us, without question or doubt. . .or continue being destroyed.  And we ARE being slowly and cruelly destroyed.
   I pray that our suffering will soon end and that I will be allowed to retain possession of what is left of my personal writings. Until then I also need to retain the only home I have left - the vehicle I've been forced to live in since my homes, work and other jobs and vehicles have been being sabotaged by those who target me.
   I often pray for God's Light to surround me and give me strength, but my strength keeps weakening. I keep bouncing back, but never as fully as before. There is only so much that a person can take. We need protection from further abuse. We need our Freedom Back. And we deserve it. We do.

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