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My New "Yearn for Freedom" Blog;
www.yearnforfreedom.blogspot.com

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Upon my Father's Request

      I'd like to set a record straight for my father, because he has requested for me to alter my past writings in ways that would erase false statements about him. I do not have time to comb through all my past writings, at this point in time, but I can let the absolute Truth be known here, although I had already also made this declaration in past writings.

    Shortly after my youngest brother's shocking death in 2002, my father and sisters drove against me in ways that deeply hurt and baffled me. In May of 2004, after he had suddenly tried to convince me that I am mentally ill, serious doubts in myself had been raised, and I cried and prayed for God to show me the truth.
That night, I had a dream, which portrayed my father as being sexually inappropriate with me as a child.    

   Because I was not yet aware of being targeted, and because I trusted my dreams and had no awareness of pysychotronic weapons and their capabilities of projecting dreams and brainwashing people. . .I believed it. (It even seemed to explain most of his unusual behaviors since I had begun heavily focusing on personal growth and healing from childhood difficulties in the late 1980s.)
    I can not tell you how much it hurt to believe this. It broke my heart. Literally. I spent days crying and writing and had THOUGHT that it also explained his (otherwise unexplainable) sudden drive to convince me that I was mentally ill, even though I'd had VERY little contact with the family since around 1990 - even though they did not even really know me anymore.
    I now believe that the dream was a projection - that it convinced me of a lie - that BOTH my father and I were/are victims of microwave mind control.
    The pain that we have BOTH experienced, as a result of this part of the targeting, is immeasurable. Though I can and have felt for my father, (whom I had directly confronted in 2006) this situation continues to be a pain in my heart. Its over for him, but not for me. My family continues to see me as the villain and does not believe that I am being targeted. . .and this dream projection situation appears to have even fueled their negative assumptions of me.
    My father STILL tries to convince me that I am "mentally ill" and, no matter how much it hurts me, I know that its best for him to retain that belief until the lethal microwave targeting of humanity is exposed and stopped. . .if that ever happens in our lifetime.

I love you and feel for you, Dad. When I started realizing the Truths I cried for you and the pain this must have caused you. I am SO sorry that it ever happened. And I feel for myself also. I count too.

P.S. Not being believed, and having loved ones trying to convince us that we are "just mentally ill", while STILL being targeted by criminals who hold us under surveillance...etc., is the most painful part of the targeting. It has been for me, anyway. All of the hell we are going through would be so much easier of there were a loved one to turn to - someone who can be supportive and understanding and helpful. This would make all the difference in the world. But this is not the case for long term Targeted Individuals. Although I know how impossible it is. . .and no matter how much I try to cover it up, deep inside my broken heart is a pain filled wish that I could turn to my father. . .and that he could understand and hold me and protect me and tell me that everything will be OK. BUT. . . the cold hard Truth remains that. . .he can't and I can't and WE ALL keep hurting, until the targeting is exposed and stopped.